For the last almost 5 years of my life I am going to admit it, I have been trying to be Super Mom. First it started when Reese was born and I wasn't going to ever going to let him eat baby food out of a jar, let him watch more than a half-hour of TV a day and there was no way we would ever have a DVD player in our car especially out running errands! More recently it has been by just taking on more and more and more without letting anything go!
Don't get me wrong, our children have some days where they do nothing but watch television all day long. But it's okay because "it's Preschool on TV"! Thanks Nick Jr.! Griffin not only ate baby food from a jar, but not too long ago we found him chewing on Paige's umbilical chord... That's a true story!! Nasty, but true!! We typically put a DVD in when we run errands so that Rob and I can get 10 minutes of peace and quiet so we can have a conversation! We have let some of those things go, but the day to day of being a mom who stays home, who keeps a perfect house, who greets her husband at the door, who runs a business from home and cooks a perfect dinner, I haven't let any of that go (not in my mind anyway).
While I make light of it, recently I have made another decision in the process to reform my "super mom" mentality. I have decided that it is actually a big deal to be the mother of 4 kids in 4.5 years and to run a business and a household at the same time. I am going to stop acting like anyone could do this and give myself credit where credit is due. But I am also going to start being real about it and make some decisions to make all of our lives easier! I am actually excited about the future in our home because I decided to hire a nanny!
I want to have time to focus on the things I love, God, my children, myself and my husband! That means I have to have help! Right now I try so hard to focus on all of those things and the truth is I am not very good at multi-tasking! I have had the kids at a sitter on Tuesdays for a long time and and it is known that in our house Tuesdays are a calm day for everyone! I want more Tuesdays!! I am looking forward to spending 100% of my focus on work during work time, 100% of my time on my family when it is family time and 100% of my time on me when it is me time! Focus breeds productivity and productivity breeds contentment!
I feel such a sense of joy and accomplishment both from being home with my children and from running my own business. I can't imagine letting either one go. Hiring a nanny will allow me to have the best of both worlds! And the best part is that I am going to stop pretending like I can take on the whole world! Super mom can be defeated...this is my attempt at making sure she isn't! :) Time to call in the forces!
Friday, July 16, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Observations by my children
Paige is so sweet and cuddly! She is worth every stretch mark and extra pound that she came with! Even more priceless are the observations that have been made by my children in the last few weeks! Beware, the observations are rated PG! :)
1. Addison to a friend from church delivering a meal: "Thank you for the food, but Paige only eats milk from mommy's special boobies and you don't have special boobies".
2. Addison: I think Paige is pooping. Addison: She looks sad. Reese: Lets give her some privacy, that always helps me!
3. Paige has a herniated belly button. One night while I was giving her a bath Reese proceeded to tell me the anatomy of each person in our house and when he got to Paige he said "Paige has a penis and a vagina". (Lets hope he isn't telling his friends at school about this)
4. Paige's eyes have blocked tear ducts so they get goopey a lot. One night we were eating hamburgers and Reese was very alarmed and told me that Paige got mustard in her eyes.
These moments are so precious and so hilarious! I wanted to take a moment to write them down so that I don't forget how sweet and innocent my children are. There is no lack of laughter in our home as long as they are making observations! :)
1. Addison to a friend from church delivering a meal: "Thank you for the food, but Paige only eats milk from mommy's special boobies and you don't have special boobies".
2. Addison: I think Paige is pooping.
3. Paige has a herniated belly button. One night while I was giving her a bath Reese proceeded to tell me the anatomy of each person in our house and when he got to Paige he said "Paige has a penis and a vagina". (Lets hope he isn't telling his friends at school about this)
4. Paige's eyes have blocked tear ducts so they get goopey a lot. One night we were eating hamburgers and Reese was very alarmed and told me that Paige got mustard in her eyes.
These moments are so precious and so hilarious! I wanted to take a moment to write them down so that I don't forget how sweet and innocent my children are. There is no lack of laughter in our home as long as they are making observations! :)
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
A new Paige!
After writing my last post I went in to see the Doctor. After the ultrasound the Doctor thought that our baby girl was going to be around 9 lbs 11 oz! Wow...that's a big ole' baby! So after a very painful amniocentesis (that was supposed to tell us if her lungs were developed enough to deliver, but ended up being inconclusive), my (awesome) Doctor decided to go ahead and induce me right away because apparently having a 10 pound baby isn't good for your body in later years. I guess I will find out since Griffin was just under 10 pounds when he was born!
I was induced around 3:30 p.m. on June 2nd and on June 3rd at 4:55 a.m. (my longest labor ever) Paige Joanna (middle named after my mom Joann) decided to make her appearance. At 8 lbs, 5 oz. I was happy that she didn't meet that 9 lb 11 oz the Doctor had predicted. However, 8,5 is pretty big for 37 weeks so I was happy to have her out of me!
She has a head full of black hair and doesn't look much like our other babies. She, like all my children, is gorgeous and I fell in love with her right away. I have this fear that because of this instant falling in love that I do with my children, that I may be a little like that Duggar woman. I really fear that I will never really be satisfied with the number of children I have. It's a good thing I have a sensible husband. I could easily be talked into a 5th! He, however seems to have more sense than that! Even when I read that post that I wrote last week I can convince myself so easily that it was worth every ache, pain and hormonal imbalance that it causes.
I am utterly and deeply in love with my children! All 4 of them!
I know people think I am "crazy" or "brave". Whatever you want to call it, I think it's blessed. I can't imagine my life without any of them. I do feel a sense of completeness in our home now. Rob said it best yesterday when he said "I can't explain it but I actually feel like a grown up now. Not somewhere in the middle."
Reese, Addison and Griffin tell us about every other minute how much they love their new baby sister. Reese says "She's the cutest baby I've never seen." I never thought it would be possible to love your 4th child as much as you love your first, but your heart just grows. I didn't have any expectations bringing her home. I just knew that whatever God had planned he would get us through it. We have a long way to go before we really know what Paige will bring into this family. She has already brought more love into our home... something I never thought was possible!
I was induced around 3:30 p.m. on June 2nd and on June 3rd at 4:55 a.m. (my longest labor ever) Paige Joanna (middle named after my mom Joann) decided to make her appearance. At 8 lbs, 5 oz. I was happy that she didn't meet that 9 lb 11 oz the Doctor had predicted. However, 8,5 is pretty big for 37 weeks so I was happy to have her out of me!
She has a head full of black hair and doesn't look much like our other babies. She, like all my children, is gorgeous and I fell in love with her right away. I have this fear that because of this instant falling in love that I do with my children, that I may be a little like that Duggar woman. I really fear that I will never really be satisfied with the number of children I have. It's a good thing I have a sensible husband. I could easily be talked into a 5th! He, however seems to have more sense than that! Even when I read that post that I wrote last week I can convince myself so easily that it was worth every ache, pain and hormonal imbalance that it causes.
I am utterly and deeply in love with my children! All 4 of them!
I know people think I am "crazy" or "brave". Whatever you want to call it, I think it's blessed. I can't imagine my life without any of them. I do feel a sense of completeness in our home now. Rob said it best yesterday when he said "I can't explain it but I actually feel like a grown up now. Not somewhere in the middle."
Reese, Addison and Griffin tell us about every other minute how much they love their new baby sister. Reese says "She's the cutest baby I've never seen." I never thought it would be possible to love your 4th child as much as you love your first, but your heart just grows. I didn't have any expectations bringing her home. I just knew that whatever God had planned he would get us through it. We have a long way to go before we really know what Paige will bring into this family. She has already brought more love into our home... something I never thought was possible!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
The End is Near
Well, the end is near. Today we find out when the Doctor will induce me. I am wondering do I now have to change the name of this blog, because mark my words, I am done being pregnant!
I do think that God does this to you so that you will do anything to get the baby out. What is "this" you wonder? Well, at the current moment, my feet have no ankles to accompany them! I pee about 5 or 6 times a night. Which wouldn't really be that bad if there was any possible way to get comfortable after I pee, but this huge belly makes it nearly impossible to get situated and by the time I do, I barely drift off and then I have to pee yet again. Laying on my back literally takes my breath away and walking up the stairs feels like walking a mile. Without all of these aches and pains and discomforts, I may be scared to death to push this baby out, but at this point, if they take this baby from my nose I will be happy, just get it out of me!
I am sure that one day not long from now, I will miss being pregnant. I will miss assisting God in this miracle. I do enjoy the little nudges and kicks. It's like a little secret language between me and the baby. She's just saying "Hey mom, I'm in here, don't get too busy and forget about me!". And who can pass up the opportunity to eat whatever you want and not feel guilty! Sure being pregnant does have its benefits. But I am nearing the end of my child baring years and I am happy to do so. Everyone says you just know when you are done and I know. This is what God had planned for our family. 4 kids in less than 5 years is good for me. I am done creating new children!
This post is intended for that day 2 years from now when all my friends are having newborns and I hold one and say "I want another one". I will hopefully (very quickly) come back to read this and remind myself that being pregnant is a long and difficult journey. The problem is that no matter how many babies I have, they will all grow up into little people and eventually adults. I am looking forward to assisting God in that miracle. The miracle of growing God fearing, loving, compassionate adults. It is afterall a miracle in this world isn't it?
Webster's Dictionary has one definition of pregnant: having possibilities of development. So with that in mind, I guess I am eternally pregnant. The possibility of development will always lie in how we grow our children!
I do think that God does this to you so that you will do anything to get the baby out. What is "this" you wonder? Well, at the current moment, my feet have no ankles to accompany them! I pee about 5 or 6 times a night. Which wouldn't really be that bad if there was any possible way to get comfortable after I pee, but this huge belly makes it nearly impossible to get situated and by the time I do, I barely drift off and then I have to pee yet again. Laying on my back literally takes my breath away and walking up the stairs feels like walking a mile. Without all of these aches and pains and discomforts, I may be scared to death to push this baby out, but at this point, if they take this baby from my nose I will be happy, just get it out of me!
I am sure that one day not long from now, I will miss being pregnant. I will miss assisting God in this miracle. I do enjoy the little nudges and kicks. It's like a little secret language between me and the baby. She's just saying "Hey mom, I'm in here, don't get too busy and forget about me!". And who can pass up the opportunity to eat whatever you want and not feel guilty! Sure being pregnant does have its benefits. But I am nearing the end of my child baring years and I am happy to do so. Everyone says you just know when you are done and I know. This is what God had planned for our family. 4 kids in less than 5 years is good for me. I am done creating new children!
This post is intended for that day 2 years from now when all my friends are having newborns and I hold one and say "I want another one". I will hopefully (very quickly) come back to read this and remind myself that being pregnant is a long and difficult journey. The problem is that no matter how many babies I have, they will all grow up into little people and eventually adults. I am looking forward to assisting God in that miracle. The miracle of growing God fearing, loving, compassionate adults. It is afterall a miracle in this world isn't it?
Webster's Dictionary has one definition of pregnant: having possibilities of development. So with that in mind, I guess I am eternally pregnant. The possibility of development will always lie in how we grow our children!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
A random day...
Last night I had a Thirty-One meeting and as soon as I got home Rob had to go into work until really late to spray greens (yes, he did that in the dark)! His plan was to sleep in this morning since he was planning to work until midnight. I woke up to the sound of him pulling out of the driveway at 5 a.m. I guess he wasn't sleeping in. I was bummed. My favorite days are ones were the kids come in and wake both of us by crawling into bed with us and then giggling because they aren't really tired. It seems like forever since we have had a morning like that!
Reese slept until almost 9:00 while Addison, Griffin and I came down in our PJ's (a rare occurrence in our home that we don't get dressed before making it down stairs). We had breakfast and read books all morning. At about 9:30 Griffin was ready for a nap and so was I. It's rainy here and we had no where to go.
Reese and Addison put on an hour and a half Dinosaur show for me in the living room. It was actually really good. We went to see Walking with Dinosaurs last week and they reenacted it remarkably well! The only problem was that I was having a hard time staying awake. This big ole' belly is starting to take it's toll on me. I heard Reese whisper to his sister "looks like mommy's tired, lets go downstairs and set up the stage for the big show tonight while she sleeps." Anyone with a 3 & 4 year old knows that you have to nap with one eye opened, which is what I did, but it was so peaceful! They did prepare a glorious stage for their show tonight! Really...it's amazing how their little minds work! There is a nest for the eggs and everything!
As I was trying to figure out what we were going to have for lunch, I realized we have nothing to eat in the entire house and I was starving and by this time so was Griffin (what's new!) I was creative and came up with something for the kids, but I really wanted Chinese food. So I called the place down the street (which I have never done before) if I had ever done that before I would know that I needed to order $10 of food for them to deliver. There is no way I can eat $10 worth of Chinese food and by this time I want it so badly I will do pretty much anything to get it. So I tell them I will be there to get it in 5 minutes. Well, thank goodness the Schwan man showed up right before we were going to leave because he informed me that I had a flat tire on my van. Darn it!! No Chinese for me!
Plan B a pint of Peanut Butter Passion from Schwan's. Yep that's my lunch after all, it has protein and dairy in it!
It has been a strange day, but I am going to take a nap while all the kids are sleeping....yes, another one! When you're 36 weeks pregnant and have 2 naps and a pint of ice cream in one day, there's really no way you can call it a bad day can you? Guess Rob will have a tire to change when he gets home, but hey, you can't have it all!
Reese slept until almost 9:00 while Addison, Griffin and I came down in our PJ's (a rare occurrence in our home that we don't get dressed before making it down stairs). We had breakfast and read books all morning. At about 9:30 Griffin was ready for a nap and so was I. It's rainy here and we had no where to go.
Reese and Addison put on an hour and a half Dinosaur show for me in the living room. It was actually really good. We went to see Walking with Dinosaurs last week and they reenacted it remarkably well! The only problem was that I was having a hard time staying awake. This big ole' belly is starting to take it's toll on me. I heard Reese whisper to his sister "looks like mommy's tired, lets go downstairs and set up the stage for the big show tonight while she sleeps." Anyone with a 3 & 4 year old knows that you have to nap with one eye opened, which is what I did, but it was so peaceful! They did prepare a glorious stage for their show tonight! Really...it's amazing how their little minds work! There is a nest for the eggs and everything!
As I was trying to figure out what we were going to have for lunch, I realized we have nothing to eat in the entire house and I was starving and by this time so was Griffin (what's new!) I was creative and came up with something for the kids, but I really wanted Chinese food. So I called the place down the street (which I have never done before) if I had ever done that before I would know that I needed to order $10 of food for them to deliver. There is no way I can eat $10 worth of Chinese food and by this time I want it so badly I will do pretty much anything to get it. So I tell them I will be there to get it in 5 minutes. Well, thank goodness the Schwan man showed up right before we were going to leave because he informed me that I had a flat tire on my van. Darn it!! No Chinese for me!
Plan B a pint of Peanut Butter Passion from Schwan's. Yep that's my lunch after all, it has protein and dairy in it!
It has been a strange day, but I am going to take a nap while all the kids are sleeping....yes, another one! When you're 36 weeks pregnant and have 2 naps and a pint of ice cream in one day, there's really no way you can call it a bad day can you? Guess Rob will have a tire to change when he gets home, but hey, you can't have it all!
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Exhausted and Overwhelmed
I think I have finally hit a wall. With 5 weeks left until baby #4 is due, I feel exhausted and overwhelmed by simple everyday tasks.
As of last week the baby is measuring a week and a half big and at my 30 week ultrasound she was almost 5 pounds. In a few weeks I will be having another ultrasound to see how big she is and at that time the doctor will decide when she will induce me.
I think we are ready. We have decided on a name (although we are keeping it a surprise), we have a new baby swing, a new car seat (who knew they expired?), and I even bought some diapers the other day. We still haven't arranged a bedroom or any arrangements for her to sleep, but that doesn't take much right? Griffin has been sleeping in a toddler bed in hopes that he will be ready to move into Reese's room by the time the baby is ready to move into the nursery. Last week Griffin decided to take his diaper off and poop on his floor...hopefully we can get past this stage before he moves in with Big Brother!
The truth is when I write it all down, it seems like we are pretty well prepared, but when I think about it I feel totally unprepared. I have been working a lot and May is such a busy month with Reese's school that I simply feel unprepared. I keep reminding myself that if every thing isn't in its place the baby will still come, she will still be loved, and the best part is she won't even remember what a wreck her mommy was through it all!
I've heard it said that God doesn't give us anything we can't handle, but right now I think God overestimated me! In just a few weeks we'll find out!!
As of last week the baby is measuring a week and a half big and at my 30 week ultrasound she was almost 5 pounds. In a few weeks I will be having another ultrasound to see how big she is and at that time the doctor will decide when she will induce me.
I think we are ready. We have decided on a name (although we are keeping it a surprise), we have a new baby swing, a new car seat (who knew they expired?), and I even bought some diapers the other day. We still haven't arranged a bedroom or any arrangements for her to sleep, but that doesn't take much right? Griffin has been sleeping in a toddler bed in hopes that he will be ready to move into Reese's room by the time the baby is ready to move into the nursery. Last week Griffin decided to take his diaper off and poop on his floor...hopefully we can get past this stage before he moves in with Big Brother!
The truth is when I write it all down, it seems like we are pretty well prepared, but when I think about it I feel totally unprepared. I have been working a lot and May is such a busy month with Reese's school that I simply feel unprepared. I keep reminding myself that if every thing isn't in its place the baby will still come, she will still be loved, and the best part is she won't even remember what a wreck her mommy was through it all!
I've heard it said that God doesn't give us anything we can't handle, but right now I think God overestimated me! In just a few weeks we'll find out!!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
My Reeser Beane
A collection of random thoughts about Reese at 4 years old!
Reese is turning into a little man every day. I can't believe his ability to comprehend the world around him. Even though I have (almost) 3 other children, I feel like Reese was just a baby yesterday. I remember how nervous we were when we brought him home. Once I remember Rob and I eating dinner and Reese was in the baby carrier and started one of the those gagging coughs that newborn babies do. Rob and I both jumped up and flipped him over about ready to do the Heimlich on him. Looking back the panic I remember feeling makes me giggle.
Another time I was in the shower and I heard Reese crying in his crib. He was probably 2 or 3 weeks old. I remember jumping out of the shower naked and dripping wet and running to get him. Now, here I stood, naked, dripping wet and getting ready to pick up my baby who was crying...what exactly was the plan here? I didn't have one, I simply wanted that sweet little boy to stop crying. I quickly realized that he could wait until I dried off and got dressed! Now, he seems to expect the same kind of service from us. Immediate response! I can't blame him, it seems we have trained him that way.
Because of how nervous we sometimes get with him he tends to be cautious. I think this is common of first children. He thinks things through before he does them. He doesn't like to try new foods. New experiences make him a little uneasy and he isn't a daredevil (which I embrace). The other day my dad wanted to take him for a ride on his golf cart and Reese wasn't having anything to do with it. After watching my dad take off as fast as it would go with it, I couldn't blame him! After watching his sister go for a ride, he did change his mind, but not before he observed very carefully!
He has an incredible way of delegating tasks to his brother and sister if he doesn't want to do them, but convincing them that he can do them if he wants to. This will become a very handy trait in later in life.
I've never met a kid more interested in science! He eagerly awaits his National Geographic magazine each month and at times prefers to watch National Geographic Channel or Animal Planet more than cartoons. If he does watch cartoons, they are typically science fiction type shows. I never thought I would allow him to watch some of them, but they feed his imagination and aren't violent so I can't see the harm!
Reese is such a lover! Yesterday I took him to the grocery store with me. It was the highlight of my day. He told me 3 or 4 times that he loved me and that he loved spending time with me! What a sweetheart! He has always been very appreciative of me! He is constantly telling me thank you for things I do that don't mean anything to the rest of the world. I remember one day when he was about 3 he said "thanks for putting the dishes away mom." Really??? He melts my heart! From that day on, I have never looked at putting the dishes away the same.
I pray all the time that his loving heart will never change. He will make some women very happy someday if he continues to have such a loving heart! I hate that he grows up so quickly, but I love watching who he is becoming! I can't imagine that will ever change!
Reese is turning into a little man every day. I can't believe his ability to comprehend the world around him. Even though I have (almost) 3 other children, I feel like Reese was just a baby yesterday. I remember how nervous we were when we brought him home. Once I remember Rob and I eating dinner and Reese was in the baby carrier and started one of the those gagging coughs that newborn babies do. Rob and I both jumped up and flipped him over about ready to do the Heimlich on him. Looking back the panic I remember feeling makes me giggle.
Another time I was in the shower and I heard Reese crying in his crib. He was probably 2 or 3 weeks old. I remember jumping out of the shower naked and dripping wet and running to get him. Now, here I stood, naked, dripping wet and getting ready to pick up my baby who was crying...what exactly was the plan here? I didn't have one, I simply wanted that sweet little boy to stop crying. I quickly realized that he could wait until I dried off and got dressed! Now, he seems to expect the same kind of service from us. Immediate response! I can't blame him, it seems we have trained him that way.
Because of how nervous we sometimes get with him he tends to be cautious. I think this is common of first children. He thinks things through before he does them. He doesn't like to try new foods. New experiences make him a little uneasy and he isn't a daredevil (which I embrace). The other day my dad wanted to take him for a ride on his golf cart and Reese wasn't having anything to do with it. After watching my dad take off as fast as it would go with it, I couldn't blame him! After watching his sister go for a ride, he did change his mind, but not before he observed very carefully!
He has an incredible way of delegating tasks to his brother and sister if he doesn't want to do them, but convincing them that he can do them if he wants to. This will become a very handy trait in later in life.
I've never met a kid more interested in science! He eagerly awaits his National Geographic magazine each month and at times prefers to watch National Geographic Channel or Animal Planet more than cartoons. If he does watch cartoons, they are typically science fiction type shows. I never thought I would allow him to watch some of them, but they feed his imagination and aren't violent so I can't see the harm!
Reese is such a lover! Yesterday I took him to the grocery store with me. It was the highlight of my day. He told me 3 or 4 times that he loved me and that he loved spending time with me! What a sweetheart! He has always been very appreciative of me! He is constantly telling me thank you for things I do that don't mean anything to the rest of the world. I remember one day when he was about 3 he said "thanks for putting the dishes away mom." Really??? He melts my heart! From that day on, I have never looked at putting the dishes away the same.
I pray all the time that his loving heart will never change. He will make some women very happy someday if he continues to have such a loving heart! I hate that he grows up so quickly, but I love watching who he is becoming! I can't imagine that will ever change!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
